In the 20th century, as the populations of more developed countries aged, an increasing body of research on grandparents and on the roles of grandparents in the modern family built up, especially in the United States but also in Europe. This interest in grandparents and their familial roles can be seen as a consequence of interest in the 20th century changes in family structures and roles. It can also be seen as a consequence of interest in the increasing marginalization of older people in modern society as their numbers increased, which meant that older people needed to construct meaningful roles for themselves in a society which had deprived them of such roles. Population structures and drivers as well as family dynamics changed significantly in the developed economies in the second half of the 20th century so the time an individual spends as a grandparent has increased as life expectancies have increased. Data reveal that about one third of the population at any time are grandparents and that about 75 percent of the population at some point in time become grandparents. A Northern European woman today whose daughter gives birth for the first time as a 29-year-old (average age at first birth) can expect to be a grandmother for almost 30 years - equivalent to almost one third of her expected lifespan.
At the Oxford Institute of Population Ageing, we have been conducting research into the roles of grandparents in Europe for quite some time now, but grandfathers had been more or less invisible in the research until recently (Mann & Leeson 2010; Mann, Khan & Leeson 2013; Mann, Tarrant & Leeson 2015; Leeson 2014). This may be because the perceived role of grandparents had become so feminized that the roles of grandfathers had not been the focus of research, or it may be that grandfathers had no roles.
The identities of men have generally been defined in terms of paid work and their workplace position, and on retirement from paid work, men seek out something meaningful to do. In this respect, there may be an identity issue for older men who are grandfathers in as much as modern grandfathers wish to develop relationships with their grandchildren, while the more traditional role as the wise man dominates perceptions.
Our research on the role of grandparents reveals close emotional relationships between grandmothers and grandchildren - relationships that actually benefit both generations and which are appreciated in the modern family. Grandfathers, however, have hovered, so to speak, in the shadow of their spouse.
Our more recent research suggests these modern grandfathers are coming out of the shadows, defining and developing meaningful relationships with their grandchildren independent of grandmothers.
Indeed, the research shows that grandfathers – both younger and older – are active, happy and engaged, who believe they have a role in the family as a grandfather and that the role is important to them and the family. They try to pass on to their grandchildren knowledge, attitudes and opinions that can help them in life, without intruding on the role of the parents.
The research results are interesting both with regard to the role of grandfathers in the modern family, but also with regard to the structure and dynamics of the modern family, particularly the way in which grandparents are a non-judgemental constant – both grandparents are incredibly supportive and they focus on the grandchildren, avoiding conflict with the parents if at all possible.
Time is something grandfathers have. They have time for their grandchildren, and most striking, it is the time they did not have with their own children. While many current grandfathers harbour regret in relation to the time they spent with their own children, they love the time they are able to spend with their grandchildren.
In addition, the nature of the modern grandfather role means that they increasingly contribute to care of young grandchildren in a way that has not occurred in previous generations. Grandparent care – by both grandmothers and fathers - is now extensive and many younger families would have difficulty maintaining full-time work without help, and it is important for economic development that these younger generations can maintain their attachment to the labour market.
Let us give the final word to one of our grandfathers, JB. He is 63 years old with two children and two grandchildren aged 9 and 5 years. The grandchildren live nearby and they spend a great deal time with JB and his wife both after school / day-care but also at weekends, when they often stay the night. JB enjoys spending time with his grandchildren and he loves telling them stories about his own childhood. Like many other grandfathers, JB regrets that his work meant that he did not spend a lot of time with his own children when they were growing up.
“I just didn’t have the time, but I did have the need I realised when it was too late. I didn’t see my own children grow up. My career came first.
"I remember having wonderful times with my grandparents and I so looked forward to reaching that stage of life where I could be like them. It’s a gift and I can’t imagine a life without grandchildren. To all those who have not yet become grandfathers, I say: Just wait, you’ll love it! And to those who have just become grandfathers, I say: Congratulations! Becoming a grandfather is life's dessert ... "
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References
Mann, R., Tarrant, A., & Leeson, G. W. (2015). Grandfatherhood: Shifting Masculinities in Later Life. Sociology, 0038038515572586.
http://soc.sagepub.com/content/early/2015/03/18/0038038515572586.abstract
Leeson, G. (2014) 'Becoming a grandfather is life’s dessert. A study of the role of grandfathers in the modern family in Denmark' in Identidades, Vinculos y Transmision Generacional (eds. Alejandro Klein, Ana Maria Chavez Hernandez, Luis Fernando Macias Garcia & Carmen Rea), Manantial, Buenos Aires, 2014.
Mann, R., Khan, H.T.A. and Leeson, G. (2013) Variations in grandchildren’s perceptions of their grandfathers and grandmothers: Dynamics of age and gender. Journal of Intergenerational Relationships, Vol. 11 (4):380-395.
Mann, R. and Leeson, G. (2010) Grandfathers in Contemporary Families in Britain: Evidence from Qualitative Research, Journal of Intergenerational Relationships, Vol. 8 (3), pp. 234-248, 2010.
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About the Author
Dr. George W. Leeson is Co-Director of the Oxford Institute of Population Ageing, University of Oxford.
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Comments Welcome: We welcome your comments on this or any of the Institute's blog posts. Please feel free to email comments to be posted on your behalf to administrator@ageing.ox.ac.uk or use the Disqus facility linked below.
